My God Hath Been My Support

A few events in the past week have led me to this point...

The first was a Sunday escape from the normal "marriage and family" class to attend Temple Prep. Let's be honest, marriage isn't my favorite subject... there is a past for the discomfort in that topic that we aren't getting into it here. I chose the class because 1. the teacher is HOTT! 2. A few of my friends were in it and 3. I remembered really liking it when I took it right before my mission. I wasn't prepared for how the lesson would hit my heart and compel me to be stronger and better about my temple attendance.

The second event was a priesthood blessing I received tonight to help with the excruciating pain in my back. Let's just say the blessing had a lot more to say then just a normal "get well soon" blessing.

The third was a desire to also read the Psalm of Nephi tonight, which, if I'm being honest, I was also not prepared for the way it would hit my heart tonight. I love the way Nephi pores out his heart in this chapter of the Book of Mormon. I was especially hit with his cry to his own soul when he exclaims "Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul." and then continues on "O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin? May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!"
It's hard for my to imagine Nephi with some great sin after reading all of the amazing experiences he had as a servant of the Lord. It's hard for me to imagine his soul "drooping in sin!" However, I know my own weaknesses, and while I know Nephis great enemies were is own siblings, I imagine my weaknesses being my enemies. My cry tonight, my psalm... "Rejoice O my heart and give place no more for the weaknesses of my soul! My God hath been my support, and I will trust in Him!"

"Sometimes he said to himself: "When I was still a man, strong and free, commanding other men, I have seen the heavens open, the sea rage and foam, the storm rise in a patch of sky and like a gigantic eagle beat the two horizons with it's wings. Then I felt that my ship was but a weak refuge from the tempest, for did it not shiver and shake like a feather in the hands of a giant? Soon the sight of the sharp rocks, coupled with the frightful noise of the waves announced to me that death was near, and death terrified me. I exerted all my efforts to escape it, and I combined all my man's strength with all my sailor's skill in that terrible fight against God! For to me life was happy then, and to escape from the jaws of death was to return to happiness. I had no use for death; I loathed the thought of sleeping my last sleep on a bed of hard rocks and seaweed, of of serving after my death as food for gulls and cultures, I who was made in the image of God! Now, however, it is quite a different matter. I have lost all that bound me to life; now death smiles on me as a nurse smiles on the child she is about to rock to sleep; now welcome death!" - Edmond Dantes, The Count of Monte Cristo

Madea - let folks go

Gods Window

There is a saying that goes "when God closes a door, he opens a window". I honestly feel like this is the pattern my life is going in right now! It's hard to see doors close, it's hard to watch people leave your life, YET I am so excited for the windows that are being opened and the new people entering it!!!

WAIT..... Why are people climbing in my window?!?!? That's a little creeperish.... ;0)

The pattern my life has taken this past year is this... I hate to see people go, so I try my hardest to hold on to them and work through things. I recently had a life lesson on friends being like trees and how some people are only meant to be in our lives for a season. "when someone wants out of your life, you let them go." I have been trying to practice this method of just letting people go, and I have found that the Lord is opening the window to better options :0)
THANK YOU for the lessons learned by the exiting leafs, and WELCOME to the new buds on my tree!

Friends are Like Trees

A good friend of mine came for a visit the other day! He came in and said, "I learned something today that I think is applicable for both of us!" He proceeded to tell me "I was watching Tyler Perry today and this is what he said! Friends are like trees. Some are the leaves, these friends go wherever the wind blows them. They are in your life for a season and then gone. Other friends are the branches on the tree. These friends take take take and never have anything to give. These types of friends should be avoided. THEN, you have your friends that are the roots! These are true friends!" I am very appreciative for that small but important lesson, especially now as I watch very important people leave my immediate life. This change of season has been hard on me, yet I know that those who are true friends will always be there! I am soooo sooooo sooooo grateful for the true friends that I have! Thank you for being in my life, Thank you for seeing my potential when I am so imperfect, and thank you for loving me. I LOVE YOU TOO!!!